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Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Orion REMIX
An uninspired fanfic by Greenbeans 
Episode .25^2: Orion 3:16 
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	"There's only one way to settle this," Artichoke put her 
foot up on the picnic table bench.

	"Family Feud?" Eileen quipped.

	"The Steel Cage!" Artichoke grinned evilly.

	Jen looked over at LeVar in an unamused manner.  "You 
knew that one day your wrestling fetish was going to come back on 
you, didn't you?"

	LeVar shrunk a bit further into himself.  "At least you'd 
get a cut of the pay-per-view revenue?" He offered in hopes of 
getting them to look at the brighter side of things.

	"Thank you, Mr. Sunshine, but we already have a fixed 
source of income," Eileen glared at their author.

	"Fine," Jen said in frustration.  "If it will get you two 
out of our fanfic, we'll wrestle you in a Steel Cage or 
whatever."

	Suddenly, a cameo popped up.

	"Honcha!  You can wrestle in Planet Hentai's Jello Pit.  
I'll throw in the lemon cream for free!" Havoc from 'Curse of the 
Fanboys!' appeared behind Onion, feeling her up while offering 
his, um, services.

	"Die pervert!" Onion launched him into orbit.

	"No jello," Jen added belatedly.

	Artichoke, unfazed by Havoc's sudden expulsion from the 
fic, continued to smirk.  "We'll see you in the ring!"

**

	A few days later, Orion and America waited in a backroom 
for their call to come out for the match.  What started out as a 
minor dispute had festered into a major television event.  Orion 
wasn't pleased by it, but figured that her author was hard up for 
cash and could use some extra allowance.

	When she told Eileen of her plan to give their cut of the 
PPV revenue to their author, she replied in a lightly mocking 
tone, "'He's my manager, my driver, my lover, and my pimp.'"

	"Been watching the 'Child's Toy' subs again, have we?" 
She asked dryly.

	Indeed, now she was somewhat regretting being pulled into 
this whole affair.  It was far too publicized and blown out of 
proportion for her tastes.

	A stagehand cracked open the door to their room and stuck 
his head in.  It was time for them to come out.  When they saw 
the overfull arena of screaming fans, they almost turned around 
and left.

	"What in the name of Serenity is this?!" Orion demanded.

	Nabiki Tendo separated herself from a group of people to 
answer Orion's question.  "Orion, baby, just making a little 
extra cash."

	"Where did all these people come from?" America yelled 
over the roar of the crowd.

	"My inter-fanfic transporting service, of course.  What 
good is it to promote an event if you can't get people there to 
see it... especially at a nice profit," she winked and returned 
to the group she'd been talking to.

	"That's it, LeVar's going to be in a world of hurt when 
this is over," Orion barely kept her anger in check.

	A small bubble appeared above Orion's head where she 
couldn't see it.  A SD-LeVar was in it, "Mommy!"

	From large speakers overhead, an announcer got the 
spectator's attention.  "Coming into the arena are the beautiful 
and TALENTED Sailors Orion and America.  They are defending their 
belt and rights to the fanfic 'Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Orion'!"

	The crowd burst into deafening cheers.  The two senshi 
tried to look composed, but they were definitely fish out of 
water in this situation.  They walked slowly up to the steel 
cage, waving to the crowd as they passed, putting on a brave 
face, when Orion spotted their author.

	"You!" Orion latched onto his collar.  "You have the 
Power of the Author, DO something about this!!"

	"I- I can't!" He tried to squirm out of her grasp.  "I'm 
not the author of this fanfic, just a spectator!"

	America put her hand on Orion's arm.  "Jen-chan, let him 
go.  This isn't his fault," Orion glared at her, "that much." 
America amended.

	Orion sighed and let her author go.  LeVar scooted away 
as far as his seat would allow him without going over the back of 
it.

	"We'll discuss this later, Author-boy," she promised him 
before approaching the steel cage.

	The crowd's cheers only grow louder at the roughing up of 
LeVar and Orion's stomping up to the cage.  Onion and Artichoke 
were already there, waiting inside.  Orion flung the door open 
and entered.

	"Took you long enough to get here," Artichoke scolded.

	"We have more important things to do," America smiled 
sweetly.  "You see, we actually HAVE fans to keep happy."

	"Not for long," Onion snapped.

	"Ladies, ladies," the referee came out of his corner 
(where he had been hiding) to break it up.  "Please, let's 
refrain from childish insults."

	"Who are you?" Onion demanded of the willowy looking man.

	"The name's Ani-chan.  I'm a hapless victim like most of 
the people in this fanfic," he pushed his glasses up his nose a 
bit more with a fingertip.  "I'd escape if I could, but I've been 
roped into ref-ing this match.  So, let's all just play nice and 
not hurt the official, okay?"

	"Chicken," Artichoke spat with disgust.

	"He sounds smart to me.  I want out of this too," America 
shook her head.

	The disembodied announcer's voice boomed over head again. 
"Ladies and gentlemen, we have a special guest for tonight's 
event.  Please join me in welcoming none other then Her Majesty, 
Neo Queen Serenity II!"

	"KAMI-SAMA!" Orion fell to her knees in defeat.  "Could 
this possibly get any worse?"

	"Don't tempt the author," America warned in an undertone. 
"She seems to have it out for us."

	America put her hand on her love's shoulder in 
reassurance.  She did not encourage her to take a good look 
around the arena.  If Orion had, she would have noticed the cast 
of 'Fanboys!' (minus Havoc) causing a ruckus a few rows back.  
Mitsuru and Shinobu from 'Here is Greenwood' had a large spread 
laid out on a chalkboard and were doing a brisk business not far 
from them.  

	If Orion had looked up, she would have seen the various 
signs encouraging violence.  But the thing that would have pushed 
her over the edge were the shirts that read 'Orion 3:16' that 
many of the teenagers were sporting.  (Some of them were 
undoubtedly students of hers).

	"Come on, love, we can do this," America encouraged in a 
hushed, reassuring tone.

	Onion stepped closer too them.  "Let's get it on!"

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'Curse of the Fanboys!' is property of His Lordship Chaos and is 
used with permission.