Beanie Visits Barnes & Noble

One night, while being perilously close to being eaten 
alive by boredom, Beanie decided to go out and look for 
something to do.  She already established that she didn't 
want go to clubbing, or cruising, when a flash of 
inspiration hit her.

Beanie: "Itai.. x.x"

"Quest to Barnes & Noble, my child, and boredom shall not 
find you," the voice inside her head invited.

Indeed, Beanie had not been to the bookstore for a while, 
but it was a risky proposition.  The bookstore would surely 
test her will against finding companions to accompany her 
home.

"It's Saturday night.  I have no social life.  I'll go to 
the bookstore!" She decided.

Upon entering Barnes & Noble a hail of trumpets welcomed 
her to her third home (after her physical one and the 
public library).  She made a beeline to the Graphic Novels 
section to scope out the latest releases.  Disappointed 
with what she found there, she moved over an aisle to the
Science Fiction.  There, she found the altar to Anne 
McCaffrey.

"Su-sugoi!" She fell on her knees before the display and 
paid her respects to her most beloved of Authors.  "I'm not 
worthy!"

Her fellow patrons glanced at her with mild concern as 
streams of tears flowed freely down her cheeks.  McCaffrey 
had recently released a new book that she did not own.  
This brought her much joy coupled with sorrow... Happy that 
new material was out there, but sad in that she was 
resisting the Force wanting her to buy a new book 
hardcover.

"One day... one day... *I* will be like Anne!  *I* will 
have books with my name on them on the bookshelf!  One day, 
a college student will face the same trials as me: 
rejoicing, but unable to afford hardcover!"
Beanie bolted to her feet.  "Makenai!"

Her fellow patrons were quite terrified by now, and quickly 
inching towards the nearest exit or section further away 
from her.

A small voice in her head encouraged that her dream was a 
feasible one.  There were enough Amanda Anderson's out 
there in the world that *one* of them would get published 
and then she could see her name on a book.  She promptly 
squished that little voice for missing the jest of her
motivation.

Feeling inspired, she moved along to the Writer's Resource 
section of the store.  After gazing upon the multitude of 
shelves, she decided that tonight wasn't the night to 
explore that avenue and continued on to the Gay and Lesbian 
Literature.

This section was always one she felt like slinking around.  
Not because she was ashamed to be caught there, but because 
reading the titles of some of the books often caused her to 
blush.  Such classics as "Great Gay Sex", "The Leather 
Man", etc. were mixed in freely with philosophical and 
motivational books.

A book by the title of "The Construction of Homosexuality" 
whimpered at her from the bottom shelf.  Kneeling down, she 
picked the book up and leafed through it.  The contents 
appeared to be as dry as the title, but the subject was 
interesting.  She put the book back and prepared to
leave since the store was closing in 15 minutes.

Walking away, the book followed her, whimpering as it was 
going along.  She picked it up again, speaking softly to 
it, "I'm sorry, but I must resist the Dark Side and not buy 
you."

The book licked her face (without leaving a papercut) and 
nuzzled up against her lovingly.

"Ara... Fine, you can come home with me," she carried the 
book with her to the front.  The book flipped its pages 
happily and kept close to her.

Beanie set the book and her Card of Plastic on the counter.  
The employee scanned her new companion, the Card, and then 
inquired as to if the Card was hers or her mother's?  
Somewhat aggravated with the frequency in which she's asked 
this question, pulled out additional ID. [1]

The book wiggled as it sniffed around the bag Beanie 
carried it home in. It was happy to be out of the store.  
Beanie was happy to welcome a new companion into her home.

Beanie and the book lived happily every after.

The End.

[1] Other trouble spots include Costco, at which the 
employees question how a bean of her youth can be in 
possession of a business membership...